true friends

In my childhood I had numerous friends. When I reached school, all these social science lessons on ‘equality’ really impressed me and I started having friends of all sorts. My mother occasionally warned me against this attitude, which they said could prove dangerous. I never realized this, until I reached college. Almost every person whom I considered as a ‘friend’ has now become a mere acquaintance. Nothing bitter happened between us, but all those ‘magical moments’ are gone! I realized equality is just a myth and it doesn’t exist in reality. Like George Orwell said- ‘Everyone are equal, some are more equal’

later on I learnt to be more cautious when choosing friends; making an effort not to befriend every other person who is sweet to me. There is even a Sanskrit saying which says ‘friendship and marriage should be between equals’. Now I have only a handful of true friends who are of the same wavelength and importantly we have emotionally and intellectually satisfying relationships. Never rush to make friends because friendship needs a good foundation. We must accept our friend as he is. The essence of friendship is sincerity and giving one’s self to your friend without thinking of getting anything in return

Friends play an important role in a person's life. They encourage when one is sad, they entertain when one is lonesome, and they listen when one has problems.As we grow up and go into adult hood we realize that there are varieties of friends: co-workers, social workers, schoolmates, and much more. Each type of friends is helpful in one way or the other. Co-workers could help solve problems and stress gain in the workplace. Friends from the community widen one's prospective by introducing new people from different areas. Friends that grew up with would share the happiness and sadness one might has. However, friends that grew up with might not always be the best friends because they could faking it or thinking process might not gel with yours . Good friends should not be measured on basis of time spent together. With good friends, one is able to have a more meaningful life. It is very difficult to have a definition of a good friend for everyone to agree upon. Since everyone has different personalities, . over all according to me there are some common characteristics shared among most of the definitions. The three main qualities that define a good friend are loyal, understanding, and encouraging.

death of a young Man

The tide recedes but leaves behind                                                 
bright seashells on the sand.
The sun goes down, but gentle                                                             
warmth still lingers on the land.  
The music stops, and yet it echoes
on in sweet refrains…..
For every joy that passes,
something beautiful remains.

I have come to the conclusion, at least on a personal level, that it is fruitless to try to make sense of death – for me, it simply did not and does not work. But what I can do instead is to try to make sense of life – to learn how to focus on and force something positive to come from the life that person lived and the legacy she or he left behind.

This is not about “finding the silver lining in the cloud” – there is no silver lining in the loss of a loved one. Rather, it is about refocusing your thoughts and memories on who that person was when she or he was alive, what gifts she or he has left behind that will continue long after all of us have passed on. You are who you are today in part because of that person. So are all of the other people who came into contact with that person during his or her life.

It is about honoring the memory of that person’s life. It is about understanding the legacy of that person’s life. It is about creating a living monument to what that person’s life meant.because that is something that never ends, that cannot be taken away from you.

Grieving is hard, everyone has different ways of coping with that but you can't really understand where people are coming from unless someone really close or something really close has gone. Everyone will share the pain but not the same pain as you might feel..

Remember this: the people you have lost will always be near you. Just look up at the sky one night and see all those big bright shiny stars? Pick one and use it as a memory - pretend it's them. You will feel much more relaxed and grieving will be much easier.

• For each thorn, there’s a rosebud…
  For each twilight — a dawn…
  For each trial — the strength to carry on,
  For each storm cloud — a rainbow…
  For each shadow — the sun…
  For each parting — sweet memories when sorrow is done.
  ….   Ralph Waldo Emerson